Toilet John is tired of living in the master’s bathroom. He needs to be a man and make his own way. He signed up with a temp agency that places him in a new job once a month. This month Toilet John is working at the Los Angeles Sperm Bank and he is disgusted.
I hate this job. I’ve been sat on ten times today. I wish women had sperm. If women had sperm this would be the best job in the world! I mean I’m not against men and women pooping in me, I’m a uni-sex toilet. However, people pooping in you versus witnessing a man getting a goofy look on his face for his “men” to surface – are two WHOLLY different things.
I can’t believe all of the adult women magazines that are sitting in the bathroom with me. I mean, aren’t adult subscriptions expensive? I swear the sperm bank could make more money by just canceling their subscriptions to playboy and Maxim, rather than paying men to donate sperm. Can’t men get off without the help of a woman denigrating herself to look sexy in a photo? Is it possible to get off on a woman because of her wicked sense of humor or random acts of kindness? Don’t get me wrong, I’m just a toilet so I don’t know the specifics of how a man’s loins work, but I thought men had two heads, with the superior head ruling above the neck and the inferior head located below the belt?
I can only hope that when my water gurgles, it’s because I like a woman for who she is, rather than what “assets” she was naturally born with.
This job sucks! I can’t wait to get next month’s assignment.
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