I’m not just your average toilet. I have arms and legs just like you. Yet as Toilet John, at times I find myself forgetting how lucky I am to be alive. The majority of my friends are frozen like porcelain statues unable to express their true emotions, yet I have a voice and a built in platform – the bathroom – to help encourage others when their bowels aren’t moving. If I was lucky enough to be born into the top 1%, then why do I so easily forget how hard life is for the other 99% of toilets?
Other times, I fall back to believing what my species is capable of rather than what I, Toilet John, am capable of. If a butterfly only thought of itself as a caterpillar, would it ever try to fly? If a toilet only believed it were good enough to get shit in, would it ever find its legs and try to stand for itself? I need to embrace who I really am and forget about the naysayers who look down on me when they come to take a dump. I’m always looking up into the cracks of others; maybe it’s time I take a look down at my own cracks within.
I may not be like all of the other toilets, but that’s what makes me who I am. If I embrace myself then maybe I can share with others what it feels like to be the 1% of talking toilets living amongst the 99% of humans. My first master always used to tell me, “If you’re never going to fit in, then always stand out.” It’s time I take my masters advice and embrace myself. I’m going to try to stand out by believing in myself and never shitting on others like they have shit in me.
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